Today I finished Round 3 of chemo meaning we are officially halfway through! Of course, that’s given the PET scan shows the chemo is working as expected - and it’s going to. I’m acknowledging the anxious thoughts related to that, but truly trying to put it out into the universe that all is going to plan.

Last week, I had a chest x-ray. I had been worried about some of the drainings and reached out to my pulmonologist about looking into it. A few hours after getting the x-ray, my pulmonologist called me. We were at lunch with one of my besties. My stomach, while thoroughly enjoying my P.F. Changs, was in slight knots about the x-ray, nervous for the results.

“I got the results of the x-ray - you did it this morning, right?”

“Yeah, this morning,” I held my breath.

“I’m really happy with what I’m seeing.” Exhale. Relief.

He went on to tell me that my lung had reached pleurodesis - it had fully expanded and reattached to the lung cavity, leaving no more room for fluid. He said the lung catheter is ready to come out!

This is such a reminder that just because I have a scary thought or feeling, it doesn’t make it more real or likely. There are good outcomes too, and they’re just as possible.

I’m doing my best to keep this in mind with my PET scan coming up. My mind’s been wanting to tell me that there will be more cancer than they expected, that I’m sicker than they originally thought. But we’ve seen signs of improvement, my lung healing as proof. It’s also possible and even quite likely they’ll tell me that the chemo is working, we’re seeing very little cancer, and we’ll keep on with the original plan.

But que sera, sera - and we’ll be ready and able to get through it all.

If you’re reading this around when this post drops, I’m probably getting my lung tube out right now! Wish me luck.

In practice of gratitude and positivity, here are some things I enjoyed this past week: